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"Oh look! You're studying history. Wow history's cool."

This is what I find myself saying nowadays. I kinda wished I had realised that I'm more of a social sciences person.

Oh well, better now than never right?

Now all I need to do is tahan a few more months and show off that I can still pull off a subject I don't like (anymore) and score well in it. Like say an A.

School is getting tiring. But on a side note, I think studying is not that hard. Like for chem. All of a sudden I have a sudden inspiration to do better and to strive for more. Thanks Muse of mine:)

Hm... I'm researching for a GP essay right now: Nowadays, the pleasure of reading cannot compete with the pleasures of visual entertainment. I think I shall answer this question in the context of literature. O.o Not one of my strongest issues but I think it's interesting at the very least. I like it how I even manage to convince myself that it's a good argument:D Zi lian much haha!

Ok, Ian says new vs traditional media. I think reading vs plays/ dance/ videos, all within the same context that books try to portray.

All hail the Muse! (can't live without her.)

Just a few weeks ago I was a hitch-hiker on an ISLE trip in Ben Tre, Vietnam, along with several schoolmates from NJC. The memories of hard labour and working conditions made my experiences there... quite memorable to say the least.

The living conditions of some of the poorest people in Ben Tre whom we went to visit are worlds apart from my experience living in Singapore. There, I met people who have little education and no land of their own, thus no livelihood. Generous churches and organisations worldwide have donated enough to allow the families whom I visited to build a house. A simple structure, rough wooden planks for the walls to block against the sun and rain, straw for the roof, and scattered tatami mats as simple flooring against the bare earth. There was no toilet, for there was no proper plumbing to remove waste. No electricity, for there was no generator. No proper cooking area, so how they got their meals were a mystery to me.

When I reflect that here in Singapore, some of the poorest of the poor live in simple one-room flats, with single or even multiple tenants, I see that they at least have electricity, plumbing and a cooking area. It seems that they are better off, for they have more of what those poor in Ben Tre will ever have. However looking deeper, those here in Singapore have their own problems too. Nasty landlords who squeeze too many tenants into a room, poor households unable to manage their finances well and fall deeper into debt, education for kids, living up to society's standards, loneliness and stress. It seems now that everyone, anyone, will always have some matter of dissatisfaction no matter in what society.

People have always been seeking a way to understand the suffering and torment around them so as to find a measure of peace within. Some wonder why the gods are so unfair. Why do some suffer and not others? Why isn't everyone equal? Why are there those who were born with a soul, a conscience, but trapped in a body unable to express itself? How unfortunate of those who were given everything (health, wealth, beauty) but yet nothing (comfort, freedom). Why does shit happen?

It seems that the answer lies in balance. It is as plain as day as night. Where there is white, there exists black. How can there be good, if there's nothing bad to compare it with? It's like a game of chance. The biggest decisions in life are based on pure dumb luck. Who are your parents? Where are you born? Which era? Your looks, the ability to express your intelligence, your health, your genes, your society... All dumb luck. It seems then that the diversity that this little game of probability called life gives is what provides life with balance. So therefore, who can blame the gods?

However is this true? I wonder if I only think this way because I live in the midst of fortune. Have I really experienced desperation? The overpowering sense of helplessness that engulfs you and eats away at your very soul and sanity? What else is there, what wisdom can be gained from truly understanding the pain and suffering among us, among others? Also, what wisdom can be gained from discovering what fulfilment and 'a life well-lived' is?

In Plato's Allegory of the Cave*, people make judgements on how they interpret what they perceive to be. It is only through careful judgement, soul-searching and wisdom of others, can we really throw off the shackles that bind us and be enlightened to the Truth.

However, anyone who has done enough of searching will soon realise that there are many different forms of truth as there are the number of people who seek it. The fact is simple: we all think we are damn smart, otherwise we wouldn't be who we are today. So therefore, our version of the 'truth' (when we think we have found it) will be the right one.

Is there ever something universally correct, something that everyone can agree on? A universal form of Truth?

Song: Sunshine of your Smile

_____________

I guess I've grown cold towards the world. As before, I suppose. Where there's only "me" and "everyone else", and life is a game where I'm the only main player. Not to that extreme extent as before, but similar in aloofness and solitude. I guess there's a price to pay for everything that you do. There's always a trade-off, an equilibrium, a balance that must be kept. Spend some time on this and you spend less time on that. In a world where there's no real truth of existence, or not yet that I have found out, everything is then an illusion. No, even the statement "I think therefore I am" is insufficient to explain the complexity of the Truth. Why are we here? For what purpose? What's destiny, and is there really destiny?

Maybe Fulfilment. When your soul is enriched and you feel you could live a thousand years. The elation of that discovery. Perhaps that's destiny.

Maybe Foresight. The ability to predict the future and upcoming events, and the ability to control them. Maybe that's destiny too.

It's much more than a path to follow or to lead. It's more than a journey. It's a way of life. To seek out one's true identity and calling, to understand all around him. The ability to influence the world and thoughts which make it. Destiny rules them all.

But with all things, destiny too will fade. Like the changing of seasons and the shifting of the tides, impermanence to one and all, none escaping her grasp.

Is there a way to escape such treachery? Is there a way to ensure everlasting destiny?